the sun has gone and forgotten me

"why does this rain pour down i'm gonna drown in a sea of deep confusion" (pink martini - hang on little tomato)

lets start this weekend off with walking down that area between the union and the south oval on campus towards the stadium garage. after a night of studying... it's been raining, so everything is a little darker and a little shiny. everywhere i look though, i go into memory-mode... and who do i see? elie. walking down to meet me in his dumb red hoodie with his headphones on... leaned over laughing his ass off... just walking around at night talking about absolutely nothing. i missed it. friday, i got to talk to him... i saw eddy and he was like... hell, lets call him. i got all emotional.
second time that night.

first time i almost started crying? trisha. when she showed up friday before we left for the party... i just missed her. i missed elaine. i missed the way everything used to be before everything was all messed up. i was so happy she was there and we were all okay. i'm always more inclined to cry when i'm happy than when i'm sad. i didn't cry either time, but i was close both times.

saturday and sunday were really nice except for being miserable in bed with some sort of odd fever-flu-cold. mizi was there with a cold towel to break my fever on saturday. i love my friends.

i'm not sure why, this weekend was really comfortable for me. you know. when you get in a place and time and temp that just feels like you are wearing your absolute favorite t-shirt and pants and your just in your comfy bed or in the sunshine stretched out, just perfectly comfortable. thats the way i feel about this weekend. (aside from the being ill part, that felt like hell.)

other than that, i feel like i can't breath and i'm going to drown.