psychosis
reason number 30 that you know you grew up in an arab home:
you have at least one irrational fear or phobia (or mental condition) which can be attributed to your mother.
so, we've established that i have psychosis. we all know i'm a little bit country, a little bit rock 'n roll, and a little bit psycho. It happens.
we also know that as a gemini, and as myself, communication is a big issue to me. i have to be able to communicate, i need to be able to articulate my ideas, arguments, and thoughts in a clear fashion. when i am unable to do this, i get überfrustrated.
now, CONNECTION TIME. my mother, one of the only people able to actually upset me, has had 20 years now to master pushing my buttons. oh and she uses it. she knows exactly what to do, whether it is purposeful or done subconsciously, to get me to this frustrated state where my brain clicks into freak-mode, and i don't know what to do... this is where the psychosis kicks in. i've realized her more effective method of pushing me to this point is by holding a discussion with me but restricting all of my arguments and changing all of hers and mine, no matter what has previously been said on topic. this therefore means to my brain that i not only am unable to communicate my argument and points presently, but i did not communicate them correctly the first time around.
i hate being misunderstood and held at that word. more than that, i hate being suffocated and restricted when it comes to communication. how can you think i'm stupid or irrational if you haven't even heard my argument and refuse to listen to any part of it!?!?
you have at least one irrational fear or phobia (or mental condition) which can be attributed to your mother.
so, we've established that i have psychosis. we all know i'm a little bit country, a little bit rock 'n roll, and a little bit psycho. It happens.
we also know that as a gemini, and as myself, communication is a big issue to me. i have to be able to communicate, i need to be able to articulate my ideas, arguments, and thoughts in a clear fashion. when i am unable to do this, i get überfrustrated.
now, CONNECTION TIME. my mother, one of the only people able to actually upset me, has had 20 years now to master pushing my buttons. oh and she uses it. she knows exactly what to do, whether it is purposeful or done subconsciously, to get me to this frustrated state where my brain clicks into freak-mode, and i don't know what to do... this is where the psychosis kicks in. i've realized her more effective method of pushing me to this point is by holding a discussion with me but restricting all of my arguments and changing all of hers and mine, no matter what has previously been said on topic. this therefore means to my brain that i not only am unable to communicate my argument and points presently, but i did not communicate them correctly the first time around.
i hate being misunderstood and held at that word. more than that, i hate being suffocated and restricted when it comes to communication. how can you think i'm stupid or irrational if you haven't even heard my argument and refuse to listen to any part of it!?!?
posted by bitterhoney at 11:00 PM
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