jones-ing it

New Year Now. its 1995... this was the first year i broke away... thats always the hardest part right? well, i did it. i didn't spend it with my family... i spent it with... myself really. i tried friends, but everyone had just a few people over and for some reason or another, i didn't want to be at any of these locations. i really wanted a good party... but everyone was gone... i think i knew it wouldn't happen... i'm not really sure what i wanted... anyhow. here i am, 4 am, and i'm not "shitfaced with my head in a toilet like most normal people are" no... i watched the ball rise to the top of the crane, yeah... the downtown crane, at my friend carmen's sister's apartment... how i ended up there is a weird story. now, its 4 am i just finished watching Kill Bill vol. 2 and i'm going to go to sleep listening to a litta bitta chilla.

i've thought for a long time that a college students existence is merely based on the search for the glorious party and party hopping until it is found. now... it doesn't happen, you most likely wont find it. because either a) you missed it because you were on the phone either trying to tell people about it, b) you were too busy looking for the next party c) it already happened and you didn't know it so now you are just trying to get back. i loathe the search and i swear not to do it. i almost got stuck in that trap today, but i pulled out REAL fast.

in other news...

i was reminded yesterday that the name mary means bitter... so, my name is "bitter honey"
that's almost too good to be true. and "quite perfect really"

happy new year everyone.
as for my resolutions. well, i'm resolved.